Generation Gap

Five months ago I decided to go on an adventure that my parents won't approve of  - getting a tattoo. It's been a plan since college but it never pushed through due to money matters, mental condition, and indecisiveness regarding the design. One tattoo led to another one and another one and another one. For five months, I managed to get four tattoos. I wouldn't say I got addicted. It's just that the artist was just around the corner since he is my brother's friend.

Having tattoos raised so many issues especially that I am from a very conservative and traditional family who views tattoos as something only rock stars, rebels, and convicts has the right to have one. I had the hard time to  hide my first three because I always wear sleeveless at home. I got busted when they saw my latest one located at my ankle. It's something I couldn't hide anymore and I decided not to hide anymore. That started the never ending arguments with my mother.

I understand it was hard to accept that your eldest daughter got inked without you knowing and you don't have any idea why she did it. Is it her way to rebel against you? Does she belong to some voodoo cult or something?     Is it her way to prove something? Every time she asks me why, I don't answer. I believe she wouldn't understand it at all. The fight would just get longer and longer until I get tired and just give up. You can't win in a fight against your parents because you are just their kid. You don't have any right to fight them at all. Your duty is to obey them. So when I got a tattoo, they felt it was me being disobedient. It was me being being stubborn. It was me being immature. But in reality, it was just me being me. I didn't get a tattoo just because I want to rebel against my parents or to show them how mad I am. It's not like I killed someone or I changed since I had a tattoo. I am still me, for crying out loud. I am  still the clumsy, childish, jolly, and happy-go-lucky kid they raised. I never lost my love for my parents. I never lost me. My mother always thinks about what people might think about me or her as a parent when they see my tattoos. Ok, it's a given that people will talk. People always fucking talk. Parents always worry about such things. They care so much about the society that they sometimes forget to ask about what their children feel.

As a daughter, I let my mom be angry with me because it was the only consolation I can give her after everything I did to myself that she  didn't like. I am ready to be scolded forever for ruining my body. I don't expect her to understand me. I just hope she could accept me. It don't matter if it would take long as long as she could do it. I admit I am not the perfect daughter as people expected me to be since I am the first born. But why do we always have to follow stereotypes? Why can't we live a life the way we want it? 

FAN GIRL FANTASY

I've been waiting for him to come back to the Philippines since last year and on Aug 25, 2011 it came true.

I am not a big fan of Korean pop or their music scene. I've watched an ample of their dramas and liked it. The last one I've seen was Perfect match (Lee Min Ho from Boys Over Flowers was the lead actor). But I've always liked Kim Hyun Joong from way back BOF fever in 2009. I am aware that he came here in June 2009 but at that time, I didn't have the will and eagerness to see him. The liking wasn't that great to make me fuss over the event. I didn't even know what the event was about and who was with him. 

Come December 2010. His latest drama Playful Kiss became available over the internet and I was one of the people who got hooked but the cuteness of the story. It was the Korean adaptation of the Taiwanese drama It Started With The Kiss. after watching it, the craving started and I promised myself that I will kill if he ever comes back. Seven months later, it happened. However, I didn't have full information of the event. All I know he is coming to promote his latest album. 

The day finally came, I decided to left work in the afternoon since his mall event was 6pm. I have hopes that because it was only 3pm I still could get tickets to enter the event venue. My officemates who I came with said I should have didn't come to work that day because a lot of fan might come. True enough, a lot of fan girls came. The tickets was already sold out as early as 11am. It ended up we were watching from the second floor. My fantasy to high five him and see him face to face vanished the moment the album lady said the tickets was sold out already.

He was so dreamy and good looking. I may not had the chance to see him face to face but I felt fulfilled because at last I saw him *fan gir!* He's having a mall tour on December according to his fansite. This time if ever he stops in the Philippines again, I will definitely definitely not gonna let it pass by!

*photo courtesy of fuckyeahhyunjoong.tumblr.com

GOT BACK

My youngest brother took his USTET yesterday and I am more than willing to wait for him for more than four hours to step foot on UST again. Many things had changed, removed, renovated, and improved after a year. I was nostalgic and remembered the things I used to do and  wish I did when I was still a student.

Here are some of the photos I took: 

 The front of the chapel. Impressive!

 It was only one building before. You can only see the University tower when you are sitting infront of the field  but now there's another one. I do not know what is the name of that condo but it is yellow and green.

 It was the first time that I actually saw the Quadri statue. The guy really looked like Piolo Pascual. haha!

The AB building (some students also calls it Commerce building). It now has two way glass for windows! It was one of the crappiest building when I was a student but it was my home for four years. 

 Manong ice cream! Buti nalang andon si manong. Nakakain ulit ako ng dirty ice cream ng UST.

Tinoco Park was also under renovation. 

and of course, the symbol of UST - the Main Building. We used to laugh at freshmen students who did sign of the cross whenever they pass by this building. 

I also visited the old gym that got demolished recently to pave way for a new building. That side of the campus doesn't give me heart burns and butterflies in my stomach anymore when I passed by. It wasn't the same without that gym. Plaza Calderon was quite gloomy now compared to a lively one I know before.

The smell of youth and the excitement of college was really amazing and it made me want to study, learn things in a classroom setup, and be a college student again. College was truly the best time of my life.

Night Road Trips

About two years ago, there was a "To Do List" in the room that's shared by me and my sister. She posted it before 2009 ended and she said it would serve as our motivation for 2010. Here it goes:

1. Find a job

2. Drive the car by ourselves

3. Lose weight.

Obviously I didn't achieve all of them. I got a job. That's all. I could drive but I do not have proper license to drive alone. Did I lose weight? It was the other way around. As for my sister, she achieved 1 and 2. She's still working on 3 by going to the gym at least thrice a week and attend yoga classes. If you ask why won't I do it too, I must tell you that I do not have enough fund. End of conversation.

So last Friday, she picked me up for the first time at my office. We drove home just the two of us. We shared stories about our work, movies, and other stuff in between while enduring the traffic in EDSA. Curses in between because of bad drivers, we wished we could pimp the car so we could act cool on the highways.It wasn't big of a deal for most of people but it was for me. It was the first time we drove home without our dad driving for us. I don't know but I feel fulfilled we were able to do all things we listed.

That drive made me realize how close we are. We shared the same room forever, we almost killed each other, get crazy over some basketball/football players and actors, and we influenced each other with just about everything in this world. I am thankful I have a sister who, for most of the time has bad temper and terrible attitude, rides life with me no matter what. She's the best friend that will eternally scold and mock me until she's satisfied. 

Next time we promised ourselves to go on a longer trip together with our other two brothers, pimped Volvolok, windows rolled down, and T.I's Whatever You Like on the background. 

*more serious stuff soon

** for the record, I have a super annoying person beside me while writing this blog and it makes me so furious. Good thing this entry isn't about my angst over work. If it is, maybe I punched him already

*** now playing: The Script songs

****I am not obliged to answer all the stupid questions this annoying person is asking me.